Résumé
― I'm the most successful person ever to run for the presidency, by far. Nobody's ever been more successful than me. I'm the most successful person ever to run. Ross Perot isn't successful like me. Romney ― I have a Gucci store that's worth more than Romney. Sorry losers and haters, but my IQ is one of the highest ― and you all know it! Please don't feel so stupid or insecure, it's not your fault.
Experience
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2017
Became 45th president of the United States
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2016
Won election race with 77 votes more than Clinton, yippe-kee-yay!
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2015
Became the most important Republican nominating for presidential election run
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2009
Changed my mind and became Republican again
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2005
Started Trump University with Michael Sexton and Jonathan Spitalny: no grades, certificates and other bureaucracy, but program offered courses in real estate, asset management entrepreneurship, and wealth creation. 98% students gave positive reviews while studying, however some of these ungrateful gringos filed lawsuits against Trump University after the course. I had to pay $25 million to settle that...
Personal life
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2006
Melania gained United States citizenship and gave birth to our son, Barron
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2005
Married her
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1998
Met my future third wife, Melania Knauss
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1999
Divorced Marla ¯_(ツ)_/¯
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1993
Married Marla and had a daughter, we named her Tiffany, because I like Tiffany & Company jewellery as well